12 ways to get over whats over, by Dr. Richard J. Stride
I am going to share with you, 12 ways to get over "IT", and get on with your life. Are you ready to get over it? Let's begin... Here are 12 things I have learned on my journey.
Carl Rogers, father of Humanistic Psychology, said persons are in a state of "being and becoming". Being what we are at this moment and becoming what we can become. Being happy requires realizing what's over is over, and living life. Things only continue to victimize us because we not "over" them yet. What ever "they" are; they re-victimizes us. Mainly because we have not let them go. We wallow in our victimization choosing to continue to embrace those "things" , that we need to let go of.
What if you could finally get over what's over? What if you did not have to live with the pain of what's over? What if you had the choice to choose life instead of succumbing to every perpetrator and perpetrating situation out there? What if you could finally be happy?
1. Do something physical everyday: Work off stress and frustration. It will give you physical and as well mental release.
2. Talk out your worries with someone you trust: You may gain a new perspective .
3. Really examine your self-talk: Most often its not things out there that stress us out or make us feel depressed, it's the way we explain things out there to our selves. If a family member or situation is beyond your control, accept it. There can't be a tug of war with a problem or family member if you don't pick up the rope. Try avoiding having unrealistic expectations of yourself and others.
4. Do something for someone else, even if you don't feel it. Try reaching out or doing something for someone else, especially if you don't feel like it. The very act of doing something for someone else changes our outlook and gives a sense of peace and well being.
5. Take one issue or thing at a time: Remember the serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace. Don't let the urgent take precedence over what's important. Examine what is really important in your life, focus on that, the urgent can wait or will more often than not take care of it self.
6. Make time for you: What do I really like to do? Pursue your passions, plan time each day for yourself to do what you feel passionate about. Learn what activities or hobbies are truly important for you AND DO THEM.
7. Give up your right to be right: If you ALWAYS have to be right and can never bring yourself to admit when your wrong, the time to change is now!! Check out whether you're "winning the battle but losing the war". It really is not so bad to say "I'm human and I screwed up". So you screwed up, so what, to judge yourself or others by one act out of the hundreds of thousands of acts we will commit over a life time is silly and wrong.
8. Get back into life: The best thing you can do is to seek out activities and people---don't wait for them to come to you. Keep telling yourself, "do it now" until you get out there. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself get OUT THERE and let people discover your uniqueness.
9. REMEMBER WE CHOOSE TO INDULGE OUR FEELINGS AND THE RESULTING BEHAVIORS: If you don't like your life change it! You're not stuck. Decide what needs to be changed and change it. Feelings come and go like the wind. We may not always choose our feelings but we CAN choose to indulge them or behave opposite. Chances are your feelings will change as you do what you don't feel like doing. You will feel a real sense of control and empowerment.
10. Expect that life isn't always going to be fair: Try to get your needs met the best way you can and realize, life doesn't always unfold the way we planned. Things happen, life is random. Rather than blaming yourself, family, God, co-workers, and others, learn the gift of acceptance. Accepting things, circumstances and others as they are will free you to concentrate on what's important in life.
11. Be a good friend to yourself: Give yourself the same flexibility that you give to your friends and people you don't know. You are not always going to perform perfectly. That's okay. Do the best you can and get off your own back about it.
12. Be present in the moment. Life is an experience; live it!!: We miss so many things because we are some where else instead of being in the moment. Keep things in perspective. Perspective and perception is everything.
Copyright © 2003 drrichard.org
Carl Rogers, father of Humanistic Psychology, said persons are in a state of "being and becoming". Being what we are at this moment and becoming what we can become. Being happy requires realizing what's over is over, and living life. Things only continue to victimize us because we not "over" them yet. What ever "they" are; they re-victimizes us. Mainly because we have not let them go. We wallow in our victimization choosing to continue to embrace those "things" , that we need to let go of.
What if you could finally get over what's over? What if you did not have to live with the pain of what's over? What if you had the choice to choose life instead of succumbing to every perpetrator and perpetrating situation out there? What if you could finally be happy?
1. Do something physical everyday: Work off stress and frustration. It will give you physical and as well mental release.
2. Talk out your worries with someone you trust: You may gain a new perspective .
3. Really examine your self-talk: Most often its not things out there that stress us out or make us feel depressed, it's the way we explain things out there to our selves. If a family member or situation is beyond your control, accept it. There can't be a tug of war with a problem or family member if you don't pick up the rope. Try avoiding having unrealistic expectations of yourself and others.
4. Do something for someone else, even if you don't feel it. Try reaching out or doing something for someone else, especially if you don't feel like it. The very act of doing something for someone else changes our outlook and gives a sense of peace and well being.
5. Take one issue or thing at a time: Remember the serenity prayer: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. Living one day at a time; enjoying one moment at a time; accepting hardships as the pathway to peace. Don't let the urgent take precedence over what's important. Examine what is really important in your life, focus on that, the urgent can wait or will more often than not take care of it self.
6. Make time for you: What do I really like to do? Pursue your passions, plan time each day for yourself to do what you feel passionate about. Learn what activities or hobbies are truly important for you AND DO THEM.
7. Give up your right to be right: If you ALWAYS have to be right and can never bring yourself to admit when your wrong, the time to change is now!! Check out whether you're "winning the battle but losing the war". It really is not so bad to say "I'm human and I screwed up". So you screwed up, so what, to judge yourself or others by one act out of the hundreds of thousands of acts we will commit over a life time is silly and wrong.
8. Get back into life: The best thing you can do is to seek out activities and people---don't wait for them to come to you. Keep telling yourself, "do it now" until you get out there. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself get OUT THERE and let people discover your uniqueness.
9. REMEMBER WE CHOOSE TO INDULGE OUR FEELINGS AND THE RESULTING BEHAVIORS: If you don't like your life change it! You're not stuck. Decide what needs to be changed and change it. Feelings come and go like the wind. We may not always choose our feelings but we CAN choose to indulge them or behave opposite. Chances are your feelings will change as you do what you don't feel like doing. You will feel a real sense of control and empowerment.
10. Expect that life isn't always going to be fair: Try to get your needs met the best way you can and realize, life doesn't always unfold the way we planned. Things happen, life is random. Rather than blaming yourself, family, God, co-workers, and others, learn the gift of acceptance. Accepting things, circumstances and others as they are will free you to concentrate on what's important in life.
11. Be a good friend to yourself: Give yourself the same flexibility that you give to your friends and people you don't know. You are not always going to perform perfectly. That's okay. Do the best you can and get off your own back about it.
12. Be present in the moment. Life is an experience; live it!!: We miss so many things because we are some where else instead of being in the moment. Keep things in perspective. Perspective and perception is everything.
Copyright © 2003 drrichard.org